Food Riot

Both cofortable and practical, a PVC Nurse uniform is ideal wear for the modern cook.

One of my finest achievements with this blog is how many pervy people have been attracted to it. About three or four so far.  Several times a day I check the stats and of recent times, I have noticed that there have been some splendid Google search terms. I am tickled pink that little old big fat me and the fine, fantastic Foodriot.org are now attracting an altogether naughtier audience. Who knows where it will all end? Read more…

Over the last two days, I have been engaged in a correspondence with a gentleman claiming to be a doctor who would like very much to make a reservation for 15 in my restaurant. Read more…

Not tonight dear, I have a headache.

To the hordes of loyal followers of this blog, all six of you, and the highly prized contributors, all four of you, I do apologise for the slow-down in posts of recent days. There’s a good reason. No, there are several good reasons: Read more…

Fillet for Anna, Ribeye for me. Two exceptional steaks.

Because this weekend was as close as we could get to coincide with the anniversary of my lovely, beloved Anna and I meeting, (Five years. Yes, she is a saint and very brave, yadda, yadda, yadda) we decided to have a slap up meal for two. Which meant we were going to have steak. And not just any steak. I wanted to get her the finest steak I could find; true loves deserve true loveliness. Read more…

If you live anywhere near Queens Park in London, you might want to indulge yourself in a masterclass of Italian cooking. I received in my inbox today, an email from this well reputed, locally favoured family-run Italian restaurant. If I wasn’t tied up with tightening the brakes on the cat, and counting all my eggs in one basket before they hatch, I’d attend. (Also, if I could spare the pretty reasonable cost, but I have to watch the pennies at the moment etc. etc)

Read more…

If you live anywhere near Queens Park in London, you might want to indulge yourself in a masterclass of Italian cooking. I received in my inbox today, an email from this well reputed, locally favoured family-run Italian restaurant. If I wasn’t tied up with tightening the brakes on the cat, and counting all my eggs in one basket before they hatch, I’d attend. (Also, if I could spare the pretty reasonable cost, but I have to watch the pennies at the moment etc. etc)

Read more…

The pork fillet shrunk a bit during cooking. Still looks pretty tasty, though!

So there I was plying you with generous doses of verbosity, telling you exactly how I was going to make Pork Wellington-ington-ington-tiddle-i-po. Well, I stuck as close as possible to my recipe and achieved a pretty good result. Pretty good, not perfect. Here are the things that didn’t work and the reasons (I think) why. Read more…

I have been busy. Very, very busy and so have not been able to be clever or interesting. So no recipe today.

Instead, I would be truly grateful if you were to read this excellent – and I do mean TRULY excellent – article, in Time Magazine, on the perfect steak. My thanks to the utterly splendid Meat Club for bringing this to my attention. Read more…

I’m developing a rather nice Sunday Morning routine.  For the last few weeks I have taken a leisurely walk down to Queens Park Farmers’ Market. I have even written about it before.

There's an almost baffling array of fresh vegetables on sale at Queens Park Farmers' Market.

Today was, in farmers’ market terms, a perfect day. An overcast, cool November morning with the threat of a little rain. It just seems so right. The place was as usual well supported by both stallholders and customers – and there were some very delicious looking things for sale. I had promised myself that I wouldn’t spend more than a tenner. Read more…

Quite so!

This poster, courtesy of London Underground always makes me laugh; its supposed to encourage people not to eat stinky food on the tube, but to me it reminds me of some of my more forthright views as a child, on cauliflower or liver. Even today, if offered cauliflower, liver or kidneys, I will offer the same response.